Tag Archives: Jezebel

Pleasing Your/My/A Man

Sensual and cuddly blowjob

Reddit is great for a lot of things, but sometimes I have to say that their advice, though well-intentioned, is…  Let’s just say interesting.  Recently there was a thread where someone was asking what the boyfriends of Reddit would like as a random surprise.  They actually came up with a number of options ranging from sweet to…  Again, interesting.

Some of the ideas are nice and simple…  Giving little hugs from behind, little surprise gifts, massages.  That all sounds pretty normal.  Then, washing him, which is a little more out there, but not exceptionally strange.  It turns out a lot of men want food, which is fine, although one guy was extremely particular:

Tacos. Like, I want to have a Saturday where we’re driving to the mall or something, and suddenly she pulls out a whole tray of tacos from under the seat and is all like ‘SUPRISE! TACOS’ and then we would eat tacos.

Ladies: say it with tacos.  But, there was one thing the original poster reminded everyone up front: “Please no one say BJ, i know thats at the top of everyones list.”  And what ended up happening?  Well, they spoke about blowjobs anyways.  Extensively.  So, if you don’t have a place to store tacos in your car, you can always show you care with a blowjob, even though we already know it’s the first thing the very large majority of men would like as a surprise.  ;)

Nigellerotica

The gorgeous Nigella Lawson

My love of Nigella is no secret.  She’s simply gorgeous, she makes food that makes you salivate and she has this sensual approach to everything she touches.  Clearly, I’m not the only person who has noticed this.  Jezebel reported on a hilariously lecherous article that a Toronto food writer named Michele Henry wrote about her, which essentially reads like something from an erotic novel.

Really…  Just read for yourself:

Nigella Lawson bites her bottom lip as she snatches a giant knife off the counter with the stealth of a schoolgirl up to no good. Swiftly, she lops a loop of fabric off her curve-hugging purple dress.

The blade nearly grazes her jugular.

“The microphone got caught in my dress,” she explains, batting her eyelashes coquettishly as if to make amends for doing something naughty.

And that’s the opening line.  Wow.  I don’t think we get much more lurid with that in the update descriptions!  It really just goes on from there.  Yes, he does mention her culinary skills, but there’s always this intense undercurrent of sensuality and sexuality in all his descriptions.  Then again, this is Nigella we’re talking about.

So…  Would you read food porn erotica?  Would you be any more turned on by a blowjob (or more) in the kitchen than anything else?  And have you ever had any culinary experiences take a turn for the decidedly erotic?  You certainly know I’m at home in the kitchen

Cat Roundup

Cat drawing gone horribly wrong

It’s Monday, and I think it might be the kind of Monday where people need a laugh.  It’s still a bit blah out, I still have 10 whole days until I can ride my motorcycle (Yes, I’m going to keep on counting down the days and then I guess I’ll text you from the road!  :P) and, well, it’s no secret that many people don’t exactly relish the return to the week.  So, honestly, what better than a few cat things I’ve been saving up?  Above is probably the worst drawing advice I’ve ever seen.  It kind of reminds me of those SFW porn ads, only much more disturbing.  ;)  Whatever you do, don’t do that. I can solemnly promise that is just not how you draw a cat.  At all.  Thanks, Reddit.

If you can get past the music on this one I found on Jezebel (it’s an acquired taste, but that’s what muting is for!) you can find out who is stealing those socks of yours…  And who is fighting to save them.  (Spoiler alert: kittens!)  This is actually really inventive filmmaking and the kittens are absolutely adorably playful, and then sleepy.  Fast forward to the 0:45 second mark for the cats, but the whole thing is pretty fun and action-packed!

My dream man with a kitty

And finally, this one that has been circulating around TNG fans on Facebook…  Be still my heart!  Is there anything that is not absolutely amazing about this man?  Of course he’s my number one!  On top of being in one of the best TV shows of all time, being an incredibly accomplished actor and an active feminist, he loves cats!  That’s one lucky feline.

I hope this made you alternately gasp, giggle and smile. Sometimes a little silly cat-related internet stuff is just what you need!

The Camille Crimson Guide to Owning and Operating a Penis #7: Condoms for Blowjobs?

Deep throating during blowjob by sexy redhead

 

Using condoms for a blowjob is a pretty contentious issue, and I wanted to come to you all with an open-ended discussion about whether you feel that it’s a necessity.  Of course, I don’t use condoms when I give a blowjob for a variety of reasons, but I also realize that not everyone is in the type of relationship as I am.

 

While I don’t want to delve too deep into the nitty gritty (this is a place of sexiness and porn most of the time, after all) but I did want to link to an article on Jezebel about the link between unprotected oral sex and the rise of certain STIs.  I’m definitely an advocate of safer sex, but oral sex has traditionally been presented as a “low risk” activity…  It’s hard to know what to think.

 

The best thing you can do is get tested frequently and ensure that your partners are all tested as well, but that’s sometimes easier said than done, especially if you’re having casual sex.  It’s not like people carry their latest test results around with them.  So I did want to talk a bit about making blowjobs with a condom a little bit sexier.

 

Not many people enjoy the flavour of latex, so there are lots of flavoured condoms out there.  It doesn’t taste exactly like strawberry or chocolate or whatever flavour you opt for, but at least it’s something.  There are also lots of flavoured lubes out there, so you can pour some on and enjoy even with a regular condom.

 

For the recipient, a lot of people experience reduced sensation with condoms, so you can look for thinner condoms, like the Kimono Microthin.  A lot of people suggest adding some lube to the inside of the condom to give more of a slippery wet feeling added to the pressure.  Also, depending on your level of sensitivity, you can look into condoms with a larger tip, reservoir or a looser top and play around with having a little more room and less tightness on your cockhead and frenulum.

 

It’s hard to ask for your partner to use a condom, especially since there aren’t  a lot of examples of that in mainstream culture or porn…  But I don’t feel pressure to take that role, as we’re showing oral sex in the context of a long-term couple…  Maybe a campaign to present it as an option, particularly when you don’t know someone as well or haven’t been tested lately?

 

I don’t know…  What do you think?  Have you ever given/received a blowjob with a condom?  How did it feel?  If you haven’t, would you?  And how would you go about talking about something like that?  I know this isn’t the most official version of a guide to owning and operating your penis, but I feel that thinking about issues that aren’t quite so cut and dry is a great way to get talking and formulating opinions…  Hopefully we can whip up a good talk and expand our views!

Dessert Porn

Funny censored upcakes

 

We’ve discussed the sensuality of food before here, but never quite in this light.  I’ve been experimenting a bit with primal baking to make things that are delicious and good for me too.  Then I came across this post on Jezebel, which brought a whole new meaning to the idea of finding something to feel good about with baked goods…

 

This is from a raw sugar company called Sugar in the Raw, and they basically ask people to submit censored versions of confections they made with raw sugar.  I guess it’s just too raw to see.  But I’m a little confused by the whole premise.  Don’t get me wrong…  I love sex and I love food, but I’m not totally clear on the pornographic connection beyond the “raw” designation of the sugar…

 

Have you ever seen real eroticism in a baked good?  Have you ever had one of those erotic cakes?  Those always made me giggle.  Have you considered food pornographic?  For me, I guess Nigella Lawson can walk that fine line…

Les Chats Ninjas

 

Occasionally, I take a break from sexy things on this blog to show another side of myself, and today is one of those days!  You all know my thing about funny cats, well, cats in general, so this shouldn’t come as a shock…  I saw this video posted around a bit and then found it again through Jezebel, so I figured it was worth sharing with all of you.  It’s in French, but there are convenient English subtitles for those of you who don’t speak the language.  Not too shabby, right?

 

I love it when cats are athletic and bizarre.  My cats are more homebodies and like to cuddle without doing anything too out of the ordinary of impressive, and I love them just the same, but getting to see all of these crazy animals in action is kind of a delight to me.  I know that’s geeky, but it’s true!

 

So, I hope you’ll all get a laugh out of these stealthy ninja warrior kitties.  It’s too bad not a one of them has throwing stars or nunchucks…  That would be pretty cool, but I guess there are limitations without opposable thumbs.