Tag Archives: Etsy

Piper Buys A Micro-Bikini Online!

Hi there! I’m Piper Blush, and this is a personal review of my experience shopping on Etsy for a crochet micro-bikini.

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Crazy elephant boxers from Etsy


I don’t completely know what to say about…  whatever this is.  With Valentine’s Day coming up soon, a lot of people are turning to Etsy for a unique gift idea.  For women, a lot of people think about sexy lingerie…  So, why not for men?  Well, I think this photo, courtesy of Happy Place, might be as good an answer as any.


Don’t get me wrong…   I certainly see the skill and time that went into it, and it’s cute in a way, but do we want squeals of adorability when we’re nearly naked?  Probably not so much.  Also, wool seems like an itchy choice for something so close to the sensitive areas.  Not to mention the fact that there would have to be a lot of size discrepancy issues when it comes to the…  trunk.  If you measured based on a flaccid penis, it might not look much like an elephant with the finished result, unless you like your woolen penis sleeve roomy.


That said, those ears do look like something useful to hold onto, so at least there’s that.  Even in a cold Montreal winter, I can’t imagine these selling like hotcakes.  Maybe for a pachyderm fetishist.  Would you wear novelty underwear like this?  Would you at least put on a good present face if you received it from your Valentine?  The twisted part of me wants to get one for Mike…  It would make a very interesting prop for a video on The Art of Blowjob!  But I wouldn’t really do that, would I?