Camille Crimson

I’m sure some of you have been reading the shocking (or not so shocking) statistics about rape and sexual violence in the US.  They’ve been making the rounds on the internet, and after Cal e-mailed me just to see if I had seen the reports, I figured that it was worthy of a blog post, even though it’s not the typical cheery/sexy thing I would post here.  It’s an important issue that needs to be discussed.

It’s unfortunately true that 1/5 women in the United States experiences rape or attempted rape and 1/4 women have been attacked in relationships.  (This specific bit of information was released about the US, and it’s hard to find Canadian statistics, but I’d imagine that it’s a similar situation here.)  This is a really awful statistic, but these numbers even sound a bit low to those in the know.  The fact is, a lot of people are pretty oblivious to these numbers, and that’s a big reason why sexual violence continues to be an issue.  But, it takes more than just awareness to reverse this disturbing trend.

First, I think it’s important not to try to divert from the issue.  Even though it’s the minority, you read a lot of comments raising points about men’s rights, male sexual violence survivors, false accusations, alcohol consumption or the fact that someone may not have met anyone who has experienced sexual violence.  The fact is that men’s rights, while important, don’t negate what is happening in terms of sexual violence.  As for male sexual violence survivors, it’s a problem that affects men and women and I think it’s really important that this is more emphasized.  But the fact is that it’s 1/4 for women vs. approximately 1/75 for men, so it’s somewhat understandable that a lot of resources are more focused on women.  Men and women both get breast cancer too, but no one balks about the fact that most of the research is designated towards women.

False accusations represent about 2% of the reports, and there are countless other unreported experiences of sexual violence, which only shrinks the false accusation percentage.  A lot of talk in comments on blogs is about how having sex with a woman so drunk she can’t say no isn’t really a crime, just a grey area.  The law disagrees, and the experience of these women disagrees too.  Finally, most survivors of sexual violence won’t talk to just anyone about their experience, and may not even discuss it with anyone outside a therapist or one or two close friends/family members.  Just because you haven’t been approached with a specific story doesn’t mean that someone in your life hasn’t had this horrible experience.

What else can you do to help stop the violence?  Making yourself and the people around you accountable for their actions.  If someone makes light of sexual violence, tell them it’s not okay.  If someone you know is trying to have sex with a woman who obviously can’t say no, intervene.  Maybe even discuss consent as a normal part of sex.  Anything where you are actively setting a good example is very valuable.

Lastly, actually get involved with volunteering for the cause.  Volunteer at a shelter, raise money for a charitable organization, get involved with your local chapter of the White Ribbon Campaign.  Whatever you can do to get involved will make a huge impact on yourself and those around you.

I know you’re all amazing, smart, kind people, so I hope this post resonates with you.

The blog has still been a by whacked out, so thanks for putting up with the disappearing/reappearing comments and posts.  Who knows?  Hopefully it’ll decide to behave from now on!

Today, I thought I’d put together a couple of funny little things I saw around the internet into one post.  The first one speaks all about my love of macs:

It’s unbelievable how true it is!  I don’t mean to sound brainwashed, but I’ll buy pretty much anything they give me the option to!  Moving right along, here are the life lessons that mainstream porn (not to be confused with beautiful porn) has taught the world about sex:

Good to know about #9.  And last, but not least, I think this is how many of us feel when we browse through porn aggregate sites.  That’s why it’s good to have a solid place to find high quality porn.  (Ahem!  Ahem!)  I think you all know what I’m referring to…

Hope you enjoyed this little laugh to get you into the weekend feeling!

I know, this is probably not the picture you were expecting, but to me…  Wow!  Here’s my crush object Patrick Stewart voicing his support of Amnesty International endeavours to end violence against women.  That’s pretty sexy right there.  On top of his geek fred, his intelligence, his talent and his rugged good looks, he’s a compassionate person who understands the value of looking beyond his life at people and causes in need of help.

Sure, he may have just been accosted with a sign and a camera on his way about town (as evidenced by his shopping bag…  couldn’t someone have held it for him for a few seconds?) but he still took the time out to be an advocate for women’s rights.  There are few things sexier than a man who respects women as his equals and wants to help out.

Besides, look at that serious expression and that motorcycle jacket…  Swoon!

No…  Not interview WITH oral sex.  I don’t do that sort of thing.  This is an interview with my friend TJ on his blog called Oral Sex.  He was kind enough to say some lovely things to kick off the interview, so I thought I’d share a little bit with you:

Utilizing engaging music, soft visuals and playful themes, Camille and her boyfriend create sensual oral sex videos. Rather than profiting on the less intimate oral sex content being produced by major adult industry studios, Camille Crimson has become successful by focusing on the art and eroticism of couples’ fellatio.

Of course, there are always a few of the same questions, but he asked some really interesting ones too, so I’m going to share a few of my favourites:

What do you think the major difference is between women who like giving blowjobs, and those who don’t?

Camille Crimson – I don’t mean to sound condescending, but I think women who don’t like giving blowjobs might have had bad experiences. Fundamentally, anyone who loves receiving pleasure should love giving pleasure. Maybe they aren’t getting enough pleasure or having their needs listened to. Maybe they’ve had selfish lovers. Maybe they’ve had bad experiences with smell, taste or gag reflexes. I think that more communication would make blowjobs at least palatable. They may never absolutely love it, but there is a way to get in touch with the eroticism of giving pleasure in the right context.

 

Why have you stuck to producing more oral sex than intercourse?

Camille Crimson – It’s a great niche to be in. Blowjobs are extremely popular, but it’s uncommon to see them done sensually and to be shot in an artistic way with a real couple. The response has been amazing. For now, we’ve got so much going on that we don’t really see the need to expand beyond blowjobs. That could definitely change, but for now, the site is keeping us very busy.

 

If you could change one thing about the way porn is made today, what would it be?

Camille Crimson – Well, I would probably change a bunch of things. The big thing would be that I’d want porn to be more contextualized. It’s fine if you want to have a rough blowjob site, but make it clear that the women are enthusiastic about this kind of rough sex, that it’s not the only way to have sex, that mutual pleasure is important… Like it or not, a lot of impressionable people watch porn and we have to try to make it clear that sexuality isn’t exactly what we see on the screen in mainstream porn.

 

Do you see yourself producing your style of pornography as a director with other models in the future?

Camille Crimson – Yes, in a way. We’ve already started with a new couple, but instead of directing them, we’ve given them the tools and tricks to make porn with the same artistic look and they can have full intimacy with what they do, no one else in the room! It works really well. Their names are Lilyanne and Max and they’re really amazing people. They’re really passionate about showing beautiful, romantic and sensual sexuality, so I think the site is going to be a huge hit. It’s at PornographicLove.com.

 

There’s a lot more where that came from, so I hope you’ll read the rest of the interview and leave your thoughts here because I would really love to hear what you thought, or if you have any other questions!

I can’t help but snicker when I see this.  I’m lucky because the site has come to a place where enough people know who I am and know not to tangle with me about these issues, but I certainly have still had my fair share of people try to lecture me about the “realities” of porn.  Porn and other forms of sex work can result in a huge variety of experiences, and pretending like you know better than someone who is actually living the experience is just ridiculous.  None the less, it happens a lot, especially among feminist or sexuality related online communities.  Even on Twitter sometimes!  Or from well-meaning people in my inbox who want to save me from my life of porn.  ;)  So, if you ever bare witness to someone trying to lambaste porn or another kind of sex work, whip out this handy bingo card and you might just win!

Hey everyone!

Today I wanted to share a really great blog post by a new fan who used to really dislike porn.  J looks into how different theories of porn shaped the way porn is perceived, especially when it comes to the constant one-upping of intense and violent subject matter.  She initially starts off talking about Pippa Middleton (Princess Kate’s sister) and how people just automatically started talking about her body and her sexuality.  That does tend to link well to the general “pornification” (her word) of society.  I’m inclined to agree.  As she continues, she gets more into theory:

Dines argues that with the advent of the Internet, the boundaries of porn have been pushed to extraordinary and often times deeply disturbing extremes. Now anybody with a will and a video recording device can be a porn star. As a result, websites are awash with ‘amateur’ contributions and, in order to cut through the clutter, people are doing more and more extreme and often times violent things to others.

As she states in the preface to her book, when Dines talks about porn she is referring to gonzo, ‘that genre which is all over the Internet and … which depicts hard-core, body-punishing sex in which women are demeaned and debased’.

 

Fair enough!  There isn’t anything wrong with that kind of porn if everybody consents and enjoys what they’re doing, but it’s true that there’s pressure to be more and more hardcore.  Even I get it from people sometimes.  The theory goes on a tangent about the possible reaches of how far porn will go, but I think that respectful but innovative porn is the antidote to that, and J agrees!

Recently I was mid anti-porn rant with a guy I know when he pulled me up with the argument that there’s all types of porn, a veritable something for everybody. He also pointed out that men are extremely visual creatures. Put bluntly, they like to watch.

From my own experience (seriously, who else’s would I be drawing from), women prefer to read or hear about what we or a character is feeling or experiencing. Hence the romantic fiction and Jackie Collins-esque ‘sex and shopping’ genres. Somebody has to be reading all those Mills & Boon that get churned out every year.

He sent me a link to some, as he put it, sexy, classy and non-skanky porn and invited me to watch. For the sake of research, I did and I have to say it was incredibly informative and educational. The clip he sent me featured a woman who owns and operates her own web-based company. The production quality was high and it could be best described as couples-based. There was no cheesy dialogue, crazy mugging for the camera or over the top screaming. It was just like watching a movie about a girl and her boyfriend together in their nicely appointed home doing something incredibly intimate.

 

Oooh, whose site is she referring to?  You may be familiar with it.  ;)

The discussion continues, going into how there will always be some people who push things to far in a non-consensual way or who objectify the unwilling (like Pippa Middleton) but that is not an indication of the general male population.  See?  Porn can be good!  But, you already know that.  So, read the rest of the article and let me know what you think!