Category Archives: Humour

Happy St. Patrick’s Day

Sexy Piper lounging

Happy St. Patrick’s day, everyone. Piper’s Irish eyes are smiling and she’s covered up with a beautiful green wrap. If you’re Irish or just enthusiastic about leprechauns, the colour green, drinking or yelling along to Irish ditties, it’s a pretty fun holiday. For us, it’s mostly about making terribly awesome puns about oral sex. After all, today is a day to get lucky! And what makes you luckier than licking? Of course, you can always kiss the “blarney stone” which theoretically could mean just about anything, but we mean genitals. ;) Top of the morning wood to ye! And, for the more analingus-ly focused: bottoms up! I think my favourite one by far is that, well, it’s magically delicious. And really, what’s more magical or delicious than oral sex?

However you say it, you can celebrate St. Patrick’s day with us at The Art of Blowjob and The Art of Cunnilingus.

Last Minute Halloween Idea?

Pam from Archer

Pam, the loveable HR representative from Archer.

Halloween is just around the corner. It’s my favourite time of year, I’d have to say. I love dressing up, parties and candy. I’m not actually so much about the spooky stuff, but one of my favourite traditions is to carve a bunch of pumpkins, save the seeds and toast them to eat later while watching a few of the classic Treehouse of Horror Simpson’s Halloween specials. While I already know what I’m going as (Pam from Archer: see header photo) I have just the thought for those of you who are 2 days out from various parties without a single idea of what to wear:

So easy! A suit jacket with tails, fishnet thigh highs and a g-string with a bow tie. Oh, and the incredibly ability to move your buns to Beethoven in perfect time with grace and elegance. I assume at least one of you will wear this… But who will it be? Regardless, I hope you enjoy this ode to the butt and to one of the world’s most celebrated composers. Can’t forget about him.

Hilarious Steps to Have More Sex (For Men!)

Camille Crimson having passionate sex with her boyfriend

You like sex, don’t you?  Well, you probably wouldn’t be here if you weren’t at least intrigued by the concept.  Cracked has 4 tips to help men get more sex, but it’s not at all what you think or what you might expect from them.  I think a lot of people think of Cracked as pure comedy, and in many ways it is, but this is comedic advice with a heavy dose of reminding men to treat women with respect.

Their points are as follows: treat her with respect forever, don’t JUST be nice — be an interesting human being, don’t think that sex is owed to you and, perhaps most poignantly, don’t read advice on how to get women/have more sex.  This is some really great and nuanced advice couched in hilarious references to everything from a fake Robocop script to anthropomorphized ice cream treats.  It occasionally veers into fake misogynist lingo, reading like the usual sex tips that men get, but it’s actually just very positive and woman-friendly concepts being fed to people who might not be expecting it.

What do you think of this?  What if we infiltrated all sorts of traditional vestiges of manliness?  Is this a spoon full of sugar to help the medicine go down, or is this hiding the medicine in something so they’ll not even realize it until it’s too late?  By medicine, I mean realistic sex and relationship advice that goes against what men are usually taught.  Maybe we could extend this to women’s magazines, too!  But who knows if you could continue to sell issue after issue and get the hits you need if you were always talking about respect…  Maybe you could!  Thoughts?

What’s Poppin’?

Delicious spicy treat for redhead Camille Crimson

Sometimes Mike and I like to have fun with the narrative of a video.  A lot of our videos are just a simple, straight-forward look at things, but once in a while we like to spice things up…  Literally.  One of the treats that Mike makes for me that I really love are his jalapeño poppers.  They’re delicious and they involve bacon…  Plus, they were the inspiration for this cute update on the new site!  What’s not to like?

Well, so, there is one thing not to like…  They’re so spicy that they literally make me cry.  My eyes water from the sheer heat, but I enjoy them anyways.  Sometimes it’s worth it, especially when he makes them for me!  I just can’t resist, kind of like this weird otter and his watermelon:

It's an otter eating watermelon

And that’s the first and last time I’ll compare myself to an otter who enjoys (or does not enjoy) fruit.  Probably.  Hopefully you’ll enjoy this video, which is a little slice of life from our home…  He only wanted to make me happy, but we wound up with tears!  Do any of you have this reaction to spicy things?  I guess it could be worse!  :P

The Oatmeal on Making Things

Comic from the Oatmeal about making things

This is a really great comic.  The Oatmeal comes up with many clever and touching things, and this is no exception.  It’s all about the experience of creating content specifically for the web.  Although he makes comics and I make porn, the experience actually doesn’t seem to be all that different.

For one, the above comic panels illustrates how it can feel like inspiration is elusive.  I know it sounds funny to say that about blowjobs, but we really do try to make each video different.  Different angles, looks, sensations, focuses, backgrounds, outfits, styles…  This Friday marks the 400th update on The Art of Blowjob.  It’s phenomenal to think that we’ve come this far and managed to keep things fresh.  It’s exciting.

The other thing is the importance of balancing the delicate art of listening to suggestions and comments and not being completely swayed to change beyond what is comfortable and reasonable.  We have certainly evolved over the years, but it’s not because people want to see me do particular things, but rather that there are things I want to try sharing.

For those of you who make creative things and share them, do you ever feel like any of this?  Or even if you don’t, have you felt similar feelings about the ways in which you relate to the world?  It’s funny to think that a hilarious comic could so succinctly describe the interesting experience of putting yourself and your work out there to the world.


I’ve certainly spoken here before about the value of taking charge and being proactive about your testicular health…  After all, I love balls and I love you and I just want you to be happy and feeling your best.  It never hurts to share a little reminder, but that’s even more true when you have a cute little jingle and a funny video to go along with it.  (Hopefully it doesn’t drive you crazy that the lyrics don’t always rhyme.  I’d lend them a rhyming dictionary if I had one.  Or Cal could just come up with some alternatives.)

The Canadian Cancer Society put together this fun, entertaining and easy to follow guide to testicular self-exams called nutiquette, because it explains the proper steps required to be polite and respectful while you perform your testicular self-exam — checking out your nuts.  It’s cute and silly, but it also doesn’t sugar coat the reality of the situation…  Don’t check yourself out in public, near an open flame or close to any wild animals.  Actually, let’s just say all animals.  That part hopefully isn’t rocket science.  There’s something about this video that is also charmingly Canadian, which is appropriate.  Maybe it’s that it’s funny and sweet with just a hint of raunchiness.  That’s a sense of humour that we seem to balance really well somehow.

If only there were always helpful singing men to explain the ins and outs of our bodies…  Though that might get distracting during sex.  Hopefully this ditty not only made you smile, but also reminded you to check yourself out.  Pass it on and remind your friends to take care of themselves using humour and music.  It’s often the best way!  So, what did you think?  Would this kind of commercial inspire and/or remind you about checking out your balls?