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Nigella Talks Dirty

23 Jan

 

You all know by now that I have a big crush on Nigella Lawson.  She’s gorgeous, she’s in love with food and she’s a very sensual woman.  And that British accent!  I think she’s simply delicious.  I was recently pointed in the direction of this hilarious Youtube video and I just had to share it.

 

It’s a great compilation of a bunch of different episodes of Nigella’s various cooking shows, but put together so it sounds like she’s saying incredibly raunchy things, mostly about cream and clams and such.  It’s silly, but it’s also somewhat arousing all the same.  I think it’ just hearing that accent, using some British terms like tart for instance…  It all feels naughty and titilating.

 

I hope you have fun laughing at this little clip.  What do you think?  Does Nigella maybe secretly say things not unlike this video in her personal life?  I think there’s a lot to her under those gorgeous eyes and those incredible curves…

Pineapple and Blog Renovations

5 Jan

I’m sure you’ve seen a comic like this on your travels throughout the internet, but it certainly made me laugh today when I saw it posted by a friend…

 

 

Of course, there’s no way to be 100% sure that the pineapple method will work, but it certainly doesn’t hurt…  Unless you eat too much and your tongue gets all weirdly sensitive before your date.  Then you won’t be able to reciprocate, as tasty and delicious as you may be!  Also, taking off the peel is advisable.  ;)

 

It’s courtesy of 9Gag, originally designed by Allie of Hyperbole and a Half.  Both of those sites are incredibly funny, but also a huge time-suck, so be ready to be transfixed and to not be able to leave your computer for several days.  Throw The Art of Blowjob into the mix and you won’t ever be leaving your computer again!  Well, I guess you might need to eat, sleep and go to the bathroom, but you’re all set asides from that.  :P

 

Asides from the funny little comic, I wanted to address what you may have already noticed.  The blog is going through a little renovation because I had to reinstall WordPress to address a few potential issues with the site.  For now, it’s directly at CamilleCrimson.com without the /blog (at least for the time being) and it will get prettier and more functional as the days go on!  Thanks for putting up with the remodelling and everything will be running smoothly on the new and improved blog soon enough!

Louis CK’s Takes on Piracy

4 Jan

 

 

EDIT: I found out I was mistaken about the DRM. It turns out the video has no DRM. Sorry for the confusion!

 

You all know I love Louis CK, right? Well, in case you didn’t know, now you do. He’s a brilliant and hilarious individual. I’m a big fan of his show, I’ve been lucky enough to see him in person and I bought his latest DVD called Live at the Beacon Theatre. The promotion he did for this latest DVD is very unorthodox, and I wanted to talk about it a bit today, specifically as it relates to my own experiences with the porn industry.

 

What Louis CK has done with his DVD is to have it available as an online item, which means that there’s no physical product, so he decided to charge just $5 for the video. Personally, I think he was selling himself a bit short, since it’s no more than a quarter of what an average comedy DVD would run for, but who am I to judge?

 

The result was incredibly positive, and he ended up breaking even within half a day and make a considerable amount of money within a week. That’s pretty impressive, but the fact is that he would have probably made more money and had to spend much less time and energy on it if he had just gone the traditional route. So, why did he do it?

 

Piracy. And I hate piracy. I applaud him for doing something like this to send out a message about how unfair piracy is. People don’t want to pay enough money for artists to actually turn a profit, so they find a way to get it for free. He’s created the alternative, to get more people to pay less instead of less people to pay more. He took a project he cared about, created it from the ground up, compensated the people around him fairly and gave a over a quarter of a million dollars to charity. That is a really cool thing of him to do, because he is a really cool guy. I wouldn’t expect any less from him and it’s really inspiring for someone like me, who deals with piracy and does things herself.

 

As I’m sure you can imagine, I deal with thoughts like this all the time. My sites aren’t ridiculously expensive, but people don’t need them to live, so they won’t pay for them unless they have ample money to do so. I completely understand it. To those of you who enjoy the blog and check out the free samples, great. I have no problem with that at all. What I have a problem with is that there is this deep sense of entitlement that results in people pirating what I do, posting it on evil forums, sharing around passwords and uploading my content to tubes. It’s one thing for me to share some samples, but it’s quite another for someone to decide they’ll just throw up a whole bunch of my new videos.

 

Piracy in general is a really big deal in porn. Everyone suffers, but at least larger companies can take the hit. Smaller companies rely on memberships to survive. The worst thing is that, whenever I find someone posting my content illegally, they are always so positive about it. They obviously like what I do and they act like they were just trying to help when I politely ask them to take it down. We’re in a culture where we’re already pretty deep in the mentality that “I can get it for free, so why should I pay?” and it’s not a good thing for a lot of industries.

 

This isn’t to say that we’re having issues staying afloat or anything. We’re lucky enough to be doing quite well. But the fact remains that each time someone pirates our content, that’s money that could be put towards creating new sites, hiring more people so we can focus more on shooting, getting better equipment… The things that will ensure that you can have lots more of the stuff you enjoy.

 

Ultimately, Louis CK’s experiment has opened some eyes about what has become necessary for artists to make a living making what people love. He’s brought an alternative to piracy into the spotlight, now it’s just important to look at his example and see what we can do to be as innovative.

All I Want for Christmas…

21 Dec

No, this isn’t about that Mariah Carey song, or the new one with Justin Bieber.  By the way, on behalf of Canada, I apologize for him.  ;)

 

I saw this funny Youtube video a couple of days ago and I think that you will all get a kick out of it.  It’s called “All I Want for Christmas” and it’s fair to say that he doesn’t want his two front teeth…

 


Of course, I don’t think that blowjobs cost dignity, and I wish that guys didn’t have to ask for blowjobs as a special holiday treat, but this song does get stuck in your head like every other holiday hit.  I wish more than just a blowjob (or whichever other sex act you enjoy) this holiday season…  I wish you lots and lots of them, not just for specific occasions!  More liberal, loving and curious approaches to sex for everyone!  But that won’t stop any of you from making cheeky jokes about mistletoe, I’m sure.  ;)

Spitting or Swallowing

1 Dec

 

This really funny video was sent to me today from Violet and Rye of Uncommon Appetites and, while hilarious, it also raises a very good point about blowjobs.  I thought I’d expand a little on the premise of spitting vs. swallowing so that we can all take stock of what’s really important and why.

 

As far as I’m concerned, there are two camps in this: people with a real cum fetish and people without one.  If you have a real cum fetish, seeing your partner swallow (or receive a facial, or snowball, or what have you) is important to your sexual experience.  If that’s the case, or if you end up with someone with this fetish, it’s important to give it the old college try as much as possible.  If it’s totally a no go, then at least you can say you’ve attempted it and attempted to get past it.

 

That said, if you’re just a standard blowjob enthusiast, the what your partner does with the end result is pretty much up to them.  I discourage making faces or acting grossed out because, let’s face it, it’s still coming from your lover’s body.  The most important thing is to be respectful of limitations in this case, and enjoy the fact that you’re getting a blowjob at all.  :)

The Onion on Porn Expectations

30 Nov


Study: Children Exposed To Pornography May Expect Sex To Be Enjoyable

 

The Onion has done it again.  If it’s one thing these satirists know, it’s how to take on sexuality with biting wit.  Even though the message of this video is sad and hits a little too close to real life, it is unmistakably hilarious.  I’d argue that a lot of porn shows a fake, unattainable sexuality, but I do think that there is porn out there that shows a more realistic approach.  I can see how my porn could maybe be considered “aspirational”, but I don’t think it’s as out of reach as all that.  At the very least, with better sexual education and better communication between people, sex could be a lot better and a lot less like it’s described in this video.  Still, it’s pretty funny.