The blog has still been a by whacked out, so thanks for putting up with the disappearing/reappearing comments and posts. Who knows? Hopefully it’ll decide to behave from now on!
Today, I thought I’d put together a couple of funny little things I saw around the internet into one post. The first one speaks all about my love of macs:
It’s unbelievable how true it is! I don’t mean to sound brainwashed, but I’ll buy pretty much anything they give me the option to! Moving right along, here are the life lessons that mainstream porn (not to be confused with beautiful porn) has taught the world about sex:
Good to know about #9. And last, but not least, I think this is how many of us feel when we browse through porn aggregate sites. That’s why it’s good to have a solid place to find high quality porn. (Ahem! Ahem!) I think you all know what I’m referring to…
Hope you enjoyed this little laugh to get you into the weekend feeling!
i love the 1st picture, that used to be me sitting in the middle until this year, i moved over to the left
Sounds like a good move!
Yes, what is it with bald, hairy or fat men in porn and why would a 20 year old woman want to shag a whole room full of them?!
Had to laugh at the semi-erect slapping too – try that on most women’s butts, faces or anywhere really and you’ll probably find yourself alone or in pain really, really quickly.
Nothing says sexy like getting whacked unexpectedly by a floppy penis.
… or getting stabbed in the leg with the heel of the six inch transparent acrylic stiletto you inexplicably wore to bed!
The confusing thing is how I, as a man, am supposed to be able to thwack someone in the tush with my floppy cock when, according to Rule #2, I’m always rock-hard. Hmmm. Maybe I’m supposed to have two penises, one that’s always hard and one that’s strictly for floppy tush-thwacking? But wait, if they’re both as big as Peter North, there’s no way they’ll both fit in my pants so that (Rule #24) women can look pleasantly surprised (or horrified) at finding them….
Man, these porn lessons are rough!
This just sounds incredibly confusing.
Very handy for rule #20 though Cal!
Very handy indeed!
Yikes!
So now I know how to get out of the speeding ticket… I’m so ready for the weekend!
I like the way you think.
#11 made me laugh. #16 is awful and I’m glad it’s not true in my life— love my Asian men! And I’d like to consider myself #30.
They’re certainly quite interesting… I’m glad they’re not true, though!
31. All women experience transports of ecstasy immediately they try anal sex.
32. That goes double for deep-throating…
33. …and triple for 31. and 32. if the man thrusts as hard as he possibly can.
34. All women just love putting a penis which has just been in another orifice into their mouths.
35. A bored ‘Oh yeah,’ becomes sexy if you just repeat it often enough
36. Men like their hands best.
Haha, excellent additions!
Great list! Re: #11,
And contrary to popular opinion, being the rocking guy playing the wild guitar solos in the ’70s didn’t help much either.
Awww!
Mainstream porn is humorous.
It often is.