JJ very astutely pointed out that I have some questions left to answer, so I picked one out for today’s blog from Joe:
I used to be the Webmaster of a very tasteful nude art site. But more importantly, I was the primary photographer. I ran the site with my then girlfriend. We were together for a decade. We shot tons of material together. Half of the content that I shot for the site was of her. We shot for many years together with both of us getting better and better at our crafts. After she and I broke up, she turned her attitude about much of the work we had done. She began to regret it. And as a single man, I found myself needing to bury my love of photographing the nude female form. Both her and my regrets about the amazing work that we did together still breaks my heart. Often when looking at the work you do with your partner, I sometimes wonder if you will ever find yourself in a similar situation. If it is something that ever crosses your mind. I know you are proud of the work the two of you do together, as you should be, it is beautiful and erotic. But do you think you will ever regret it? Heavy question, I know, but it is the most interesting thing I think I can ask.
Well, that’s a pretty sad situation, and I’m sorry to hear about the pain it caused you. I think that, when it comes to relationships, there’s always a risk of regret over the things you do together and the memories they leave behind. Whether it’s looking sadly at a gift from an old flame or having more concrete memories of your love like pictures/videos of intimate moments, that kind of an ending is always painful. I really feel that we are in it for the long haul (16 years and going strong), but I also know that no matter what happens, I will always be really proud of what we’ve done and I’ll be able to find the value as being more than anything else weighing against it. As much as it’s a romantic thing, it’s also a creative and business endeavour, so I feel like there are so many reasons to stand behind it. Hopefully that answers your question! It’s a little heavy, but I just know that this path I’ve taken has had such a positive effect on my life, that I’ll always be happy to be a part of it.
That is a very sad situation for Joe. And you looking at the work you and Mike have done as something positive in your life is a good way to look at things. No matter what happens, at least you’ll always have the work you did together. Memories made that you can watch. Usually things are always sad when they end. Relationships, a loved one passing away, a close friendship coming to an end. They all hurt, but trying to recall the positive things about them makes the hurt a little more bearable.
Exactly, JJ. Granted, I feel that Mike and I are going to be together forever. So there’s that, too.
I have always wondered what would have happened to me if some of the loves of my life had not exploded. The answer is to look not only at the good, but at the bad as well.Look at what would have happened to you if that impossible relationship had continued to blossom, and destroyed you.
I loved a genius of a woman when I was in college. We made passionate love. She was Magna cum-Laude, I barely graduated.
She became and was famous, I did not. She became a lesbian.I longed for her for years. I wondered what would have happened if we married. I know know it would have been dreadfully unhapply.
I found a woman, who loved to give the most the delightful blowjobs, and could screw for hours. She unfortunately married my boss, because of her poverty. She was not only an alcholic, but hooked on drugs.
Now, I live with the love of my life, she and I have our problems, but we are deeply in love and hopefully will never part except by death. We have the wealth of each others love.
So, I can only tell you, that the longing for the impossible never goes away, the best you can do is savor it like you would a wonderful meal, and move on, as the present is the best present you can get, and fate sometime saves us from ruin.
That’s a very good bit of advice there, Ralph, which I would say applies to pretty much everything. Enjoy what you have while you have it and move on, open to better things coming along.